Letters to Lillian

Letters to Lillian
First it was two,
then we had you.
Now we have everything.

Letters to Lilly,
our daughter through adoption.

Monday, May 21, 2012

Hope says, "I wish my future will be bright," where faith says, "I know my future, and it is bright."

We had an inspiring weekend Little One. Your Dad and I took a trip to Virginia to attend the Families for Private Adoption Seminar. Words cannot describe how amazing it was.

We arrived Friday afternoon and stayed at a nearby hotel, so we were able to relax. We went to a movie, walked around the Tysons Corner mall and had a nice dinner out. It was wonderful to feel like we were getting away for a little while.

The next morning, we were on our way to the seminar. It was a gorgeous spring day, the sun was shining and the sky was blue as ever. We walked into the church conference room where the seminar was held, and immediately it felt like a big hug. It was such a friendly, warm environment that felt so supportive. We heard stories from all walks of adoption life- successful adoptive parents, adoption lawyers, social workers and even a birth mother. It was wonderful to get perspectives from every angle.

Looking around the room, I couldn't help but think I was surrounded by the best parents in the world. Not to pat our own back, but adoptive parents are a certain kind of special, Lo. They are the parents that fight for their children from the very start. They are the parents that want more than anything to be parents. They were just like us. We're not alone in this.

It was amazing to hear from adoptive parents who had sat where we were sitting not long before, and knew what it was like to be in the trenches. It was amazing to hear their stories of how they did it, and see their beautiful babies. It was amazing to hear from a birth mother who was still okay and proud of her decision, even though it was 28 years ago. It was amazing to hear how she was a part of her daughters life, walked her down the aisle on her wedding day with her adoptive parents. It proved that our idea of family does work, that we're not crazy and that thousands of families get there this way.

 

The last speaker of the day was a psychologist who is an adoptive father himself who gave a spirited talk about the difference between hope and faith, and it really resonated with us. Faith is knowing something is going to happen, whereas hope is, well, just hope. It's easily lost, a short fall from despair. But we have faith, now more than ever. We know this is going to happen, because we're going to make it happen.

One thing almost all of the speakers at the seminar said repeatedly was, "You only fail if you give up. If you don't give up, don't quit, you'll get your baby."

 

Well, Little One- if there is one thing your Dad and I aren't it's quitters. We're never giving up. We won't quit until we get you in our arms.

 

Tonight is session 2 out of 3 with our social worker for the homestudy. The last one is on Thursday. We're nervous, but it's a completely different feeling from the first visit. She knows us now, she's seen our home and now she's just trying to get to know us as people. It's hard to believe that soon the homestudy will be over and our focus will be solely on finding you. Hopefully the search won't last long, but we're willing to wait.

 

We're never giving up, Lo.

 

With faith,

Love,

Mom

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